Welcome to The Executive Mom blog. You will find wonderful blogs about how to be a more efficient, empowered, loving, and happy mom while bringing peace, stabilty and consistency into your home. I will lend real life failures and successes, and I will share my wisdom. I hope that you will feel encouraged and excited in your mommy journey. Please head over to my blog tab, stay awhile and read. 🙂


To Have a Friend, You Must Be a Friend

I remembered as a child receiving a bookmark from my best friend with the words “To have a best friend, you must be a best friend,” and a poem about it.  All I could remember at the time was that I was someone’s best friend.  I was content.  Today as an adult, I realize there is more.  The saying is so correct that we must be a friend to have a friend.  I am no longer content just with “being” a best friend, I want to “do” and step into an action to build into my friends.

Life gets busy. Kids activities, sickness, personal schedules, school, vacations, etc. can make friendships tough. I have not always been the kindest or most fun person to be around either. I can be preoccupied with the future, worry, stress, and sometimes this comes across negatively to others. But over the years, what have I learned about friendship? If I build into someone else, I have a better friendship.  Not only do I have a better friendship, but I feel better in my own life.  That friend also builds back into me, and they help me in life.  I may not always feel like I have the time, but in the end, there are many more benefits to building into a person than being self-absorbed or lackadaisical.

Have you been too busy to build into a friendship?  Are you holding back from people in your life?  If so, I want to ask you, what might they benefit from if you were to build into their life?  What wisdom could you share, what encouraging word might make their day, what positive effect might you instill into them?  Are you holding back because you are lonely?  Do you feel so exhausted that you have nothing more to give?  Do you feel like you would have nothing positive or wise to say to your friend?  The truth is, we as humans, need to help others.  It’s a deep conviction many people have. Helping others fulfills a longing in our life, it makes us “feel” better, it drives us in life.  You have the power to create a positive affect that can make the world better. And you never know just when someone could use a text, phone call, hug, or time spent together. You reaching out could be exactly what your friend needs right now!

I hope you will enjoy these other blogs as well about getting alone time, how to control stress, and finding and achieving goals on your bucket list.

Secrets: Insider Trading Is Bad News!

I have been given the pleasure of being a part of many secrets in my life. Between influence and personality, I am the kind of person people confide in. I’m highly empathetic and caring, and people tend to pour out their heart to me. I like being that kind of person in someone’s life, and I do honestly enjoy being on the inside.

When I was in high school, I learned an important lesson of not sharing secrets with others. I didn’t learn it from a specific memory, but I slowly learned that secrets don’t make friends. I liked having the power of a secret, but I quickly learned how much it hurt a relationship when it came out to others who were not supposed to know a secret.

And let’s be honest, who doesn’t like a secret? Who doesn’t like to be on the inside? Who doesn’t like to know a juicy tidbit about someone else? I know I do. However, is it worth the hurt and damage to a friend if the secret comes out when it shouldn’t? I don’t think it’s worth it. That is why I don’t share secrets, and haven’t for many years.

Sharing a secret is like insider trading: bad news. It can get you into a lot of trouble. You may not go to jail, but it can cause a backlash of unintended consequences. Just like with insider trading, you have to be careful what comes out your mouth. Just like insider trading, you are giving someone information that you don’t have permission to share. And just like insider trading, it puts your reputation on the line.

When people tell me a secret, I tell them that I won’t share the secret with anyone unless they give me permission. It’s a boundary I won’t cross. And I say, “If I didn’t start the secret, it’s not mine to pass on.” I truly 100% stand behind this saying. If I didn’t create the secret, choose who to tell the secret, have to live out the secret, how is it my right to pass it on? Sometimes I like to say something silly. When the secret teller says to me, “Please don’t tell anyone about XYZ.” I reply with, “I don’t know what you’re talking about.” That is my code for, it’s stuck in my head only.

Gossip can be fun, but it’s only hurtful in the end. I like to live by the golden rule, so if I don’t want others sharing my secret, why would I share someone else’s secret? Simple, right?

As the executive in your home, you have to act like an executive. Executives don’t share insider company info, they don’t burn bridges, and they think long-term/strategically. I want to encourage you to think the same way. Be wise in your decisions, and show your loyalty to friends. After all, aren’t they worth it?!?

Here are some articles you may like about how deal with hurt people , the importance of a legacy, and creating a board of influencers in your life.

The Life Coach In Me

I love being a full-time mom, but let’s be honest. We are all full-time moms whether at home all day or at the office all day, or any part-time or work-from-home combination. We are all moms all.the.time!

My professional background before kids started in outside sales which led to a project manager role. This led beautifully into my true passion with starting a business as a life coach. I was successful at helping women discover who they were at their core and what they wanted to do with their life, both professionally and personally. I was called the “Dating Yourself Coach.” That meant that women could reconnect with themselves so that they could better achieve what they wanted out of life with goals, priorities, balance, boundaries, strengths/weaknesses, and so on. I loved what I did, and I was thriving. Then entered motherhood.

With coaching, you meet over the phone with clients for fourty-five minutes once a week. Because of life schedules, there is no consistent schedule with coaching sessions. And I knew that I longed to be at home with my kids. I had a conflict. And I had to choose. So, I chose my baby. And I don’t regret this decision. I can always go back to coaching, but I can’t go back to the days of one child who does tummy time and blows saliva bubbles.

I write this, not because I think you should choose the path I took, but as a reminder that we all have to give up something (or multiple things) when we become mommies. Motherhood comes at a great price, and without many sacrifices. Some of those sacrifices are as simple as giving your youngest all of your blueberries at breakfast or some of your fries at the restaurant because you love your child and want him to not be hungry. Some of them are huge sacrifices like ending a business to be at home with your kids. But, I truly believe with every sacrifice comes an equal or better blessing. I am getting the chance to be with my kids up-close and personal every day. I have even begun homeschooling them in preschool. I never dreamed of doing this! And I am loving every minute of it.

And I still have this blog to reach out to women like you, and encourage you in your mommy journey. It’s not all bad.

What sacrifices have you made, Mommy? What sacrifices are you facing right now at a crossroads? What decision will you make? What will have long-term benefits and blessings? I think the best way to make a decision, besides prayer, is to think of the long-term benefits, blessings, and rewards. Whether it’s a job, school for your child, potential move, etc., what is the best decision and/or sacrifice for your family and children? After all, we are mommies, and we sacrifice constantly. Just make sure it is a great sacrifice that will benefit and bless everyone involved. As I used to end my blogs as a life coach, “To your success!”

Talk The Talk

If I were an executive at a company, it would be imperative that my employees get along. I would hire people who I thought would fit nicely into both the company culture and the team culture. I would focus team efforts, whether working together, getting together for lunches sometimes, and just getting to know each other and how each other are wired.

As a mom, I did not hire my children. I did not interview them. I didn’t even choose them from a line-up of other children. I did, however, squeal with joy when I found out I was pregnant with each of them. And as many people say, they are so different from each other. My oldest is cautious, a natural born leader, and is structured and orderly. My youngest, on the other hand, is all about fun. He does not feel a sense of responsibility, tries to get out of cleaning up, doesn’t mind being messy, and is not cautious in the least. For a company team, they don’t have much in common. They do love their family, so they have a similar strong company culture, but I am not always sure they have a strong team culture. So, I as the mom have to fill in the holes.

How do I do that, you ask? Well, it’s a lot of work, and it takes consistency. But, it works.

When my oldest was just three years old, you could ask him, “Who is your best friend?” His answer? His brother’s name. And even today, they are two peas in a pod. They play well together, they hug, kiss, and touch everyday, and they laugh together everyday.

It starts with me telling each kid how blessed they are to have their brother. Here is something I say, “Out of all the brothers in the world and of all the times in the world, God gave you this brother.” And if you step back, it sure is amazing that these two boys got paired up in life!

Another thing I do it point out the great attributes of the other brother. It goes like this: “Isn’t your brother so funny?” “How great is it that your brother likes cars as much as you do?” (when one brother is trying to take cars from the other. This helps dispute fights). “How blessed are you to have a brother as kind as him?” (pointing to brother). As they get older, it can get more specific too like, “Aren’t you glad you have a brother who stands up to you or includes you when others don’t?”

I encourage my children to touch everyday. Everyone needs touch whether male or female. I encourage my boys to hug before naps and bedtime. Even though the younger one weighs almost as much as the older one, he still likes his little brother to sit on his lap. And, sometimes with storms, my older son will try to hug and comfort the younger one. I notice little pats, kisses, and caresses throughout the day. I know eventually these will turn into jabs, light punches, and other boy touches, but the fact is that they do it on their own because they love their brother.

I discourage the unkind talk while encouraging the good, loving, and kind talk. It is not always easy, and it doesn’t always work (but then what does always work with kids, she writes as she rolls her eyes). I see the benefits of my consistent work. I hear the laughs, I see the playtime, and I witness the love. And at the end of the day, it’s worth the work I do to encourage my boys to be best friends. I often tell them, “Your brother is your best friend for life. Treat him right, and you’ll be friends for life!” And it’s true.

You make like these articles as well:  rotating toys, room time,  and vacation planning.

Just Say NO!

The phrase, “Just say no,” is a common phrase for kids warding off peer pressure.  However, when you become an adult, how many times do you hear that phrase?  In 2008 a movie came out called the “Yes Man” starring Jim Carry. In the movie, the main character is no longer able to say no after making a promise at a conference.  How many times as adults do we feel like we have promised to never say no again?  We feel that if we do, we let down our family, co-workers, friends, and perfect strangers.  We have a balancing act going on.  “Sure, I can handle one more thing, just place it on top of the other ten things I am already carrying.”  Are you exhausted?  Are your arms tired yet?  If you are exhausted in life, I encourage you to ‘just say no.’

I have a personal conviction in my life.  I will only say ‘yes’ to you if I can follow through 100% of the time. This means I will only say yes if I can fully commit.  If I can only commit 90%, I will tell you ‘no’, and I will not feel badly about this action.  Do you know why?  If I can only commit almost all of my time, effort, and energy, but not 100%, I am bound to let you down at some point.  I have decided, though, that I would rather let you down at the time of the first request than at the end when you have invested time, effort and expectation into the situation and me.  I know that it is more respectable and reliable to let you know what I can and cannot handle.  What a freeing feeling to say ‘no’ and feel good about saying ‘ no’.  When is the last time that you have ever felt good about saying ‘no’?  Well, starting today you can feel good about saying ‘no’, and you can learn your limits at the same time!

Being busy can be a negative place in life, and saying ‘yes’ too many times can lead to burn-out.  What in your life must you do right now?  Responsibilities like family including a spouse, children and an elderly member, job, taking care of a house, paying bills, sleeping and eating are high priorities in life and need our ongoing attention.  What do you want to do with your spare time?  This could include volunteering in your church or local community, hobby, projects and friends.  What will not change if you said no?  This might include extra hours at work, excessive time on projects around the house, too many activities with children, purchasing extra “toys” that bring more stress to pay and keep functioning, and anything that would cut into time with sleeping eating, working, and family.

Are you beginning to see some areas where you might be able to say ‘no’?  Are you seeing that if you say ‘no’, life will still go on?  Do you see that you might, at this moment, be letting someone down and unnecessarily stressing yourself?  Are there one or more areas that you could say ‘no’ to right now that would bring you feel relief, provide more time for higher priorities in life, and maybe even help repair relationships?  If so, JUST SAY NO!

Here are some other article about keeping your child safe in a parking lot, how to be the mom, and and keep a legacy.

Three Practical Ways To Oranize Your Life

Three Practical Ways To Organize Your Life

Life is so busy and time is so short!  Does this describe your life?  There seems to be a shortage on time to relax and organize life, but there doesn’t seem to be a shortage on “things” to accomplish in one day.  Do you ever feel overwhelmed?  Do you feel like you do not even know where to start?  Do you think that if you could organize your life it would eliminate stress?

I would like to suggest three ways to organize your life that you can implement today!  And, they are not difficult or time consuming, which is even better.

  1. Start by making a to-do list.  This list can be as fancy as a calendar in Outlook or a smart phone, and it can be as simple as opening a notebook and writing on lined paper.  Write out everything you need complete in a day, week, or month.  You can make the list as detailed or broad as you desire.  Write out items that pertain to your business and personal life.  Decide later if you want to keep them combined or have two lists:  one that you keep at work or on a work computer pertaining only to work and another personal list.  Once you have this list, make sure to keep it with you or in a location that can be easily found.  This will make you much more successful with completing your tasks.  Making a list should not take much time, and the more times you make a to-do list, the easier and quicker it will become. I keep mine in an app on my phone.
  2. Next, prioritize this list.  Next to each item on the list, put a one to ten, twenty, or even one-hundred.  One will be the highest priority.  This will enable you to know what item to do first and which to ignore for now when you look at your list.  For me, I like to put my top priority as number in my final list.  That way, I can go down my list and complete each item on the list easily without searching or remembering what was most important.  You will find that there might be items that seem important, but once prioritized are not as important as originally thought.  This will also deter procrastination, as you will complete the most important items, not the item quickest to eliminate.  Overall, this should eliminate or lessen stress! Then, you can reorganize them by number, so that when you look at your list, you can easily go down to the next item when you finish the previous item. For me, I make my list chronological by day. This allows me less time to think and guess and greater efficiency and ability to get more done with my multi-tasking day.
  3. Here is the best part of organization…reward yourself!  Set up a system, and when you achieve certain tasks or your entire to-do list, reward yourself for your hard work.  This will encourage the habit, and it will prohibit burn-out.  You can set tiered rewards, but make sure to thank yourself.  It can be as small as allowing yourself a night off, or as big as you want.  The reward can be monetary, time with friends, time doing nothing, or time working on a hobby.  Just make sure that the reward is something that will motivate you to continue organizing your life.

You either have control of your life, or your life will have control of yourself.  Which do you choose today?

You might enjoy other blogs like  rotating toysfolding laundry, and How To Be a Micro Manager (Of Your Schedule.

How Much Water Is In Your Bucket List

How Much Water Is In Your Bucket List?

I can’t believe that it has almost been more than half a decade since I went skydiving!  This experience had been my dream for over ten years, and now it’s a memory in the past.  I remember how excited and nervous I was as I was walking toward the plane before leaving the ground to jump into thin air, not to mention driving to the location.  I remember having butterflies in my stomach the week before the event every time I talked about it and thought about jumping out of a plane.  I remember how nervous my new husband was as well.  Now, I don’t often get the chance to talk about it with anyone, and my husband is much calmer…maybe he has even forgotten about it by now. It’s interesting how we make big plans, and later on, when completed, they seem as part of our life story, not a great adventure.

After completing skydiving, the next items on my bucket list were to go zip lining and travel outside the country (even though I had traveled, I wanted to do this again).  I am still contemplating deep-sea diving.  I also want to visit Australia (which is far outside the country), start a traffic jam (sounds fun to me!), start a family business, and see this blog change peoples’ lives.  What do all of these things have in common?  At the surface, nothing really.  However, you will find these items bunched together on my bucket list.  Do you have a bucket list?  Is it written out?  How many things have you marked out?

It’s very easy in life to get compliant and comfortable.  We get into a routine…wake up, brush our teeth, eat breakfast, check Facebook, complete your daily tasks for work, take care of kids, run errands, kiss our spouse when he gets home, make dinner, eat, clean the house a little or yard work, play with the kids, walk the dog, watch TV, go to bed.  Sleep for six hours.  Wake up, brush our teeth…  Is this really how we want to live life?  I sure don’t!!  I want to believe that I am on an adventure in life.  I want to believe there are exciting things ahead.  I want to believe that my dreams, goals, and bucket list ideas really can and will come true!  Guess who is responsible for this?  ME.  Guess who is responsible for your bucket list?  YOU!

When is the last time you got out a pen and paper (or your iPhone) and wrote a list of goals or achievements you want by the end of your life?  When is the last time you thought of the adventures you want to take in life?  When is the last time you thought of the items in life that you want to achieve?  Do you even know what you want to accomplish in life?  When is the last time you thought about whom you want to affect in your life?  When you are at the end of your life, what would you like to have checked off on that list?

What kind of life do you want?  Do you want a non-eventful, mediocre life that contains the same to-do list every single boring day of your life? Or, do you want your life to matter?  These items do not have to be daring, nor do they have to involve a life jacket or helmet.  Do you want people in your personal and professional life to remember you?  Why not make some of the goals centered around your family and/or your profession?

Why not start now with a list of things you want to do by the end of your lifetime.  Here’s the catch…we are not promised a certain timeline in this life, so start today and cross items off your list now.

Read more about finding your passionsupdating outgrown toys, and vacation planning.

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Practice What You Do

Practice What You Do

I am blessed to have two sons. They are close in age, and play so well together. If you ask my oldest who his best friend is, he will answer with his younger brother’s name. They laugh together, argue together, play together, and often hug. This makes my mommy’s heart so happy. Well, maybe not the arguing, but it’s par for the course.

Another thing that makes this mother’s heart happy is when we go somewhere and we get compliments on how well our boys behave. We hear comments like, “Most boys won’t sit still that long,” “You boys are so well behaved.” “I just love the smiles on your boys faces.” And the list goes on. And I hear these complements nearly every single time we leave our home by complete strangers. I love to hear these compliments, not because my kids are so much more amazing than other kids (although let’s be honest, every mom thinks they have the best kids in the world, am I right? J), but because I have worked diligently to get these compliments.

I do not expect my kids to sit for a long time, to be well behaved, to keep their hands to themselves, to share, or to be happy if I don’t train them how to do so. Just as an executive trains his/her team, just as a manager on-boards a new employee, and just as a company has on-going training to show employees what the expectations are, so I do the same with my subordinates. I do this for several reasons:

  1. I want going out places to be easy and enjoyable for me.
  2. I want others to want to be around my kids, and to not have extra stress from my kids.
  3. I want my kids to learn how the world works, and to know expectations so they can also enjoy their time out.

In my opinion, it’s a win for everyone. So, we practice what we do.

At home we have “structured playtime.” This ranges from a myriad of different activities. Here are a few of my favorites:

  1. Mat time—this is where I give my little ones toys, books, puzzles, etc. on a mat or blanket, and they play in this boundary area for 5-15 minutes.

Benefit: The child learns boundaries so when we are outside the home, he/she can stay in the cart at the grocery store, next to the cart, near me at the ballpark, etc. This trains a child that mom and dad decide the area and boundary for the child. I have yet in a half decade had a child run away from me, or wonder where my child went. What a blessing in this scary world in which we live.

  1. Highchair time—I let each kid color, play with a puzzle, draw, or play with stickers in the high chair for 5-15 minutes. I choose the activity and they enjoy playing. Even my little boy enjoys to still get in the highchair, even if he can barely fit. I usually put him in a chair at the table for his “highchair time.”

Benefit: This also helps a young child stay in a cart at the grocery store. This also helps at a restaurant. We give our children toys to play with if they finish first or before the meal arrives. They are not always cooperative, but 80% of the time it works for us.

  1. Sit time—they must sit with their hands together for 30 seconds to a minute. I’ll admit this is a harder one for boys, and has been a real struggle for me. However, I haven’t given up.

Benefit: I have just recently seen my oldest have success with this. When he is frustrated, wants to yell, or cry, he can squeeze his hands together and let frustration out this way. It doesn’t always work, of course, but I have seen a temper tantrum dissolve, and I have seen him gain self-control faster.

  1. Sibling playtime—this is time that I decide my kids should play together. They can play with anything, but they are in the same area of the house or room playing together. This is often time in the evenings after a nap because they haven’t seen each other for a while. I more actively have to get involved during this “training” time because arguments do arise.

Benefit: It teaches them to work together, share, and that the world doesn’t revolve around them. I use this time to remind them that their brother is more important than a toy. It is teaching them that long-term they can’t always control who is around them. This will play out when they have a group class assignment at school, roommate they don’t get along with well, or a co-worker they don’t have much in common with much later down the road.

These activities are preparing my kids now and in the future to better handle life. I want my subordinates to be happy and prepared for life. If I were truly running a company, I would make sure that my employees knew what the expectations were for the company, and how to be the very best employees. I know I want the very best kids I can get, and that means that I have to do my part.

I hope this blog will help you think long-term, and help you if you feel discouraged. I hope you will walk away with new ideas to help your young children. And I hope you will feel empowered to make your kids the best possible kids out there!

Here are some articles you may like about how to be the momkeep a legacy, and how to get alone time.

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Mundane is so mundane

Mundane Is So…Mundane!

Life can be so boring. I get up every morning at the same time each morning. I spend time with God (which is not usually mundane). Then, I wash my face. Sometimes I think, “Didn’t I just do this last night and yesterday morning? Why am I doing it again?” Then, I brush my teeth. Again, I have the thought that I did this also twice yesterday and will have to do it again tonight. Even fixing my hair can feel so mundane and repetitive, especially if I don’t know what to do with my thick wavy mane. But, I fix it because that’s the boring stuff that life is made up of.

Recently I was talking to a woman who was in desperate need of help in her life. She is a single mother and not very organized. What seems like a no-brainer way to organize to me or just mundane in my life is thought-provoking and new revelation to those who are not gifted in the organization department…which is most people! I decided to use this post, then, to help you, fellow Mommy, with organizing the mundane, the must-do’s, the hygiene items, and the “why I am I doing this again?” things in life. You see, I’m like you. I’m a busy mom, and my head may explode if I have to add one more to-do to my list! This is especially true if it will be a mundane or boring task. Why spend time thinking about the simple and repeating tasks in life? So, here’s my list.

  1. I take showers the same time and day each week. I have seriously dry skin, so I shower every other day. I also read an article about the benefits of showering every other day about ten years ago, and this habit stuck. I don’t have time or the brain power to remember when I last showered, and I really don’t want to realize while at coffee with a friend or on a date with my husband that it’s been three days since I last showered. Or worse, I can’t remember the last time I showered. And I have heard my husband question himself or me with when the last time he showered. I don’t have time for that, so an easy way to automate and organize this mundane task is to schedule it. I shower every Sunday night, Tuesday night, Thursday night, and Friday night or Saturday morning. Come rain or shine, I don’t have to worry about staying clean. We also do this for our kids’ bath nights.
  2. I do the same load of laundry on the same day of the week. I don’t mind doing laundry really, but it’s not something I look forward to either. And, I don’t want to think much about it. Since I stay at home, I don’t ever want to do laundry on the weekend. That is a “no way, Jose” for me. I also don’t want a laundry day where I get buried in laundry all day. It doesn’t work for me personally. What I do is a group of laundry each day. Here is what my laundry days look like. Monday: kid laundry. Tuesday: towel laundry rotating with whites the next week. Wednesday: adult color laundry. That way, if I miss something, I am still done by Thursday, as I try to keep my Fridays open with light tasks.
  3. I do the same cleaning on the same day of the week. This is the same as laundry. I want to automate cleaning as much as possible. I do enjoy cleaning, especially after I start, but I don’t want to stress about it. Ain’t nobody got time for that! So, I automate it. Here is my cleaning schedule. Monday: downstairs bathrooms, wipe down light switches downstairs, and vacuum downstairs. Tuesday: dust entire house, clean upstairs bathrooms, and light switches upstairs. Wednesday: clean kitchen and kitchen table and vacuum upstairs. Many times, my chores bleed into Thursday, but again, I am finished by Friday.
  4. I plan the same kind of meals each week. I would rather scrub a toilet than cook, although I am a pretty decent cook. I just don’t like being stuck in the kitchen for very long. That being said, I don’t want to think about meals very often so I have automated them. On Mondays, I usually have a lighter day, so I do a nice meal. On Tuesdays, we have leftovers. Wednesday is also a nicer meal. Thursdays is my night to make a crock pot recipe. Fridays are a fun night whether homemade pizza, tacos, or hot dogs. Saturday is up for grabs, and Sunday usually involves eating at a restaurant after church and then a simple meal that night. By automating my meals, it allows me a night off every Tuesday, as we have built up our stash. It also allows me to make a nicer and simpler meals without much though. Again, I don’t want to think much about a necessity.
  5. I go to the grocery store the same day each week. I have decided that this day is not one for morning activities or play dates. Our local grocery store has “Double Ad Wednesday,” so it has become a habit to go on every Wednesday to take advantage of the sales. And whatever I can’t get at my local grocery store goes on a “pick up” list from our large chain grocery store. I have a recurring to-do every Monday to put together my grocery list online, and then submit it by Tuesday. I shop at our local grocery store, then swing by the large grocery store with their “pick up” service (which takes only 15 minutes. I can get you a $10 off code if you click here.). Within one-and-a-half hours, I can drive to both grocery stores and drive home. It saves me a half hour of time, I have found, from making the trips two separate instead of one consecutive journey.

I am sure I have other automated mundane tasks, but those are my top five. Who knows? Maybe I will write a second blog in the future to help you more. I would enjoy your feedback on what you automate and if any of these tips helps you save time and sanity.

We all have the same amount of time in the day. I hope I can help you to use yours more efficiently and to benefit your life and your children’s lives too.

Visit these other posts to help with efficiency: vacation planning, rotating toys, and folding laundry in less time.

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It's a Blessing To Be You, The Mommy

It’s a Blessing To Be You, The Mommy

Photo: Iris, the author, at Christmastime 2017.

There is much advertising going on currently that tells us to live in the moment, do what makes us feel good, and do what we want. While there is some validity to this, there is also some damage to these thoughts. If we just focus on now, and not tomorrow, we can really mess up ourselves and our lives. If we want to live for a long time, have a positive influence on those around us, leave a legacy with our children, and treat ourselves well, we have to think broader than this moment.

Therefore, how do you start your day? Are you happy, are you sour, are you starting with enough energy to get through the day? I know it sounds silly, but sleep really does matter. And especially in this season. It seems like I personally can never get enough sleep.

And, how you start your day does affect not only your children, but also your spouse. Do you want your children to leave the house energized or downtrodden by a day that has barely begun?

You get to be a mommy, and you were blessed enough to have children (whether biological or adopted). WOW! Let that sink in for a minute. You, my friend, are blessed. Let’s celebrate. Let’s show this excitement in the morning.

Now, I’ll be honest, I am not a morning person. One of my closest friends is, and to hear her in the morning is well, incredible. She has a permanent smile on her face, energy in her voice, and she is ready for what the day brings. I think her children are lucky to have a mom like this. And, while I cannot offer this lifestyle to my children, I want them to always know that I am happy to see them each day. I don’t want any of them to feel drudgery when their eyes first meet mine. I don’t want them to think they are a burden in my life, and I want my husband to start his day off well when he leaves our home. So, I encourage you, Mom, to think about your demeanor in the morning.

If you are a morning person, you have an advantage. What I would say to you (and the other moms reading this blog) is not to let your frustration from the evening before, the emails you have read today, or the stress you are already feeling this morning to penetrate to your children.

For those of you like me who are not morning people, try to find something to be thankful for this morning and celebrate the sun and new morning. Try to show excitement and happiness to your children, even if it’s a struggle. Don’t they deserve that? It will translate into a better day at home, at school, with friends, and in their jobs. Remember the saying, “If Mommy ain’t happy, ain’t nobody happy?” Well, it’s true. You set the tone for your home.

I say this because it has been a struggle for me lately, and I want to encourage you as I encourage myself to be happy in the mornings and start my day out well. You never know the influence your good mood and smile can have to your family and those outside of your home. A smile and good attitude can change everything!

Here are some articles you may like about how to control stress, stay connected to yourself, create a board of influencers in your life, and get alone time.